Sunday, May 09, 2010

Cage Match: Selene vs. Bill Compton

Drusilla edged out Marlow 8-6. The voting was a little tepid on that one, people! Only fourteen votes? We need to get the word out!

Today's fight is between the divine Selene from the Underworld series of films, and everyone's favourite southern gentleman, Bill Compton from True Blood. Selene won the coin toss, and so the fight will take place in the subway system of an unnamed metropolis.

HOW I THINK THE FIGHT WILL GO:

Bill is ill at ease. He has never been comfortable in larger cities, especially not those of the modern era. He paces the subway platform nervously. When he sees his opponent emerge from the darkness of the tunnel, he feels a curious mixture of dread and attraction. Selene strides toward him with purpose, her long coat billowing out behind her. She stops about twenty feet away, and crosses her arms over her chest.

"Just for the record, I think this 'tournament' is idiotic," she announces.

Bill shrugs, and smiles with as much charm as he can muster. "We don't have to fight, I guess."

Selene's eyes narrow, and she suddenly tosses him something shiny. Bill catches it, and yells in pain. He drops the silver dollar to the group, nursing his burnt hand.

"Why?" he demands angrily.

"Just testing something out," she replies. "If you're allergic to silver, this will make things much simpler. And quicker."

From beneath her coat she draws a semiautomatic pistol and shoots Bill twice in the heart.

"Sorry about this," she says. "But I really don't have time for this shit."

Bill has just enough time to feel the burn from the silver nitrate in the bullets. And then nothing.

Projected Winner: SELENE

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